Why I Love Being In A Multicultural Relationship
Intercultural couples are becoming more and more common in larger cities. In my opinion, this is a good development, as it promotes the understanding of different cultures, and it slowly eliminates the thought that ethnic groups should stay among themselves.
Nevertheless, such intercultural relationships are not without challenges. Often, culture is deeply rooted within our unconscious mind, which for some part dictates what we say, how we say it, what we do, and how we think. Even second generation children, who have never lived in the country their parents are originally from, learn a lot about their parent’s culture, habits, and way of being.
Still, in despite of the difficulties, I love having a partner with a different cultural background than my own. In fact, me and my partner are both from very different cultures, and both our culture is again different than the culture of country we are living in.
Learning about culture
One of the features I love most is that having a partner with a different culture background allows me to learn a lot about different cultures, but also people in general. I notice how I sometimes overreact about things, which seem odd to me, or how she is challenged with specific things I do or say. Yes, sometimes we argue and fight over such little things, and it seems that we are miscommunicating, only to find out that we were in fact talking about the same thing. But I also learn when we have friends around, and how she and her friends are communicating. Often, people with different cultural backgrounds know many people with other cultural backgrounds, so I am not only learning about her culture, but also about the culture of her friends.
Opening up oneself
Having a partner with a different cultural background does something very interesting to me: it forces myself to open up to habits or ways, which are new to me, which seem weird, or even rude. It puts my own beliefs in life into perspective, and it demonstrates that my beliefs are by no means ‘true’. This is something which few people actually can do; many people who are not connected in some way with different cultures on a regular basis view their own beliefs as ‘true’, while rejecting belief systems which do not correspond to their own.
Opening up myself to other cultures has actually brought me many new friends, and it has allowed me to better understand why people indeed live as they live, and why certain societies around the world are organized as they are.
Spicing up the relationship
Although disagreements in a relationship are anything but pleasant, it does spice up the relationship a bit. Sometimes, a good disagreement can truly spice up the relationship, release tension, only to come a bit closer towards each other in the end. I feel, that a continuing harmony in a relationship sometimes does more damage than good.
Adopting all the good things
Having a partner with a different cultural background allows me to sometimes adopt some of the belief system of the other culture. Since, as explained above, I have started seeing my own belief system into perspective, I also start to view it more objectively. In my opinions, some things might be valid, but some things might not. And hence I can decide for myself what I want to adopt to my general believe system. I call this human development, something that I usually spend a lot of time on.
Living in a relationship in which different cultures coexist can be a wonderful thing. It poses so many benefits, and it allows both partners to open up a bit more, and explore each other in a different way. I learned a lot about different cultures already, and I feel I generally understand people with different cultural backgrounds a lot better. Still, patience is valuable, because that is one of the mandatory things one needs to keep a multicultural relationship healthy and alive.